Back Burner Blues

Have you ever noticed how hard you work for the ones you love; so hard that sometimes you don’t put that same energy into yourself? 

This is a disease I like to call “putting yourself on the back burner.”  I remember seeing my mom do it several times with my sister and I growing up; and I can now see myself doing it with my family.  I believe the disease is genetic, lol. 

Far too often, most of us are the most selfless humans in the world and we don’t even know it.  We go through life pleasing and meeting everyone’s needs but our own. Why is that?  Why is it that people strive so hard to do good things for others, but never take the time to do good things for ourselves? 

I can admit that I am horribly guilty of this.  I will move mountains for other people, get them whatever their hearts desires; but when it comes to me? Nothing.  I noticed this when I was shopping one weekend.  Something so simple as buying something for myself, I find every excuse not to.  Now, if my husband sees something in the store that he wants, I will make note of it and do what I can to get it for him to make him happy.  If we are in the children’s section, I’m dropping coins on the kid with no problem. See how weird that is? EXACTLY! Lol.

Sometimes I have to remind myself that there is nothing wrong with treating myself to things just as often (if not more) as everyone else I love.  I think this comes with adulting; once you realize there are others who need you, you know that leaves less and less time to treat yourself to the things that give you all the feels. I have to work on this; I assume that the older I get, the better I’ll do with it. 

We shall see. 


3 Comments Add yours

  1. tunisiajolyn84 says:

    When I reflect back to moments when I’ve done this, it was usually because I wanted to help or heal some part of me through external means because it was too difficult to bring that help or healing or even joy internally through myself, for myself. There’s almost a strange guilt there where we feel like we are being selfish. I could be wrong but this feeling seems more prominent with us, women. It’s almost like an outward expression of inward desires and sometimes we treat those around us wonderfully in hopes to receive that same feeling externally because it is easier to grasp and hold onto. It’s tangible and not so abstract so we will deplete ourselves in hopes to fill someone else up to the point where they will share with us what we truly wish to gain within. I hope that makes sense. lol I am guilty of this and although I have the awareness of this, it doesn’t mean that I don’t still do this. It’s nice to remind ourselves that it is not selfish to give to ourselves but really self-full… and when we are full, we are able to give even more to others because our cup will runneth over. That’s just my two cents for what it’s worth. Anyway, I really enjoyed your post and thanks for sharing! 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Whitney C. says:

      Thank you for your input, I agree with you completely!! ☺️☺️

      Liked by 1 person

      1. tunisiajolyn84 says:

        No problem! Thanks for the inspiration to think about it.

        Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.