Have you ever gotten into an argument or disagreement with someone, and found yourself trying to push your feelings or emotions onto another person; and continuously gottten upset when they don’t see things your way? Or did you want someone to feel the same way you felt about something, so you decide to try and push whatever agenda or feelings that you have about a situation on them so they can feel just as sad at? If you have felt this way before, then it’s safe to say that you may have been projecting your negative vibes onto other people, and that’s not what’s up, friends.
So, let’s dissect this, shall we?
What does it mean to project anyway? The definition of project is to transfer or attribute one’s own emotion or desire (another person) to, especially unconsciously. Which means, whenever you’re feeling, jealous, angry, sad, upset, insecure, fearful, anxious, etc. you can project these emotions onto others around you, and allow them to feel the same way.
So, I’m sure you’re asking yourself; what would make someone want to project their negativity onto someone else? I believe its because it feels good to us. The truth is hurtful and we don’t want to be exposed to any parts of it by ourselves if we don’t have to be; so instead, we decide to push our feelings and insecurities off on people so intensely that they begin to feel as if they are theirs as well. Before we know it, we have projected some negative vibes into the atmosphere and the reality of the situation is, we are still wallowing in our feelings alone, and all we’ve done is pissed some innocent people off in the process.
As I was digging into this subject, I began to ask myself some questions:
- Do people find it easier to project their emotions onto others? Does it give them a sense of relief?
I believe for some people, it does. I think for some, it serves as a defense mechanism. If they are able to take that feeling and pass it off to someone else, and feel as if that burden is no longer theirs, then they are no longer worried or concerned.
- Do you consider how you’ve affected someone else emotionally with your negative projections?
I will admit that I have attempted to project my emotions onto someone in the past, and I was called out on it. There was a discussion about it and the air was clear. After that, I was able to recognize how I contributed to that, and I do my best to not project on others. I have learned from my mistakes (because I’m human enough to admit I am not perfect and I have done this before), and I work hard not to do it again, because it is not a good thing to do to anyone.
- Is it possible to project positive emotions?
The last question was actually one I got listening to a podcast, and it made me think. I don’t believe there is a way that you can project positive emotions, by definition. If I am attempting to transfer my emotions onto someone else, I am basically trying to force the way I think, feel and believe onto someone else; which could be possibly setting myself up for disappointment in the long run. I feel like your intentions may be good; however, the overall intent will still be lost, and in the end, someone will end up on the losing end of it either way.
So, with all this being said; I leave you with this question that I even asked myself:
How can we prevent negatively projecting our emotions on others?
One way I see doing this, is fully accepting our own emotions, and working through them like big girls and big boys should. There are far too many instances when we project negatively on others, just to deflect what we truly want to feel and process ourselves, and that not only is unfair, but it’s also very toxic to spread that kind of negative energy around to others. The best thing to do, is to begin to own up to whatever emotions your feeling, and learn how to deal with them as an individual and move on so that you don’t have to allow anyone to be subject to your projections.