So, I saw this question posed on Twitter and decided it would be a good question for me to answer in the form of a blog post. So many times, we hear young millennials say “I can’t wait ’til I’m grown”; and quite frankly, I can remember a time when not so long ago, I was saying it myself. Now here I am, grown, and wishing I was a teenager again without all these adult responsibilities! I mean, what was I thinking?!
So the question posed on Twitter was this:
“what or when was the specific moment in life when you felt like an adult?”
My answer would have to be the first time I paid an electric bill in the winter time. It sounds very silly to say, but that moment was a teachable moment for me, because I learned a few things:
- How to strategize keeping my temperature in my house reasonable to save money (energy saving techniques and whatnot)
- How electric companies gouge prices in the winter time (because that’s really all they’re doing in the end smh)
- Why my mother was so adamant about me NOT touching the thermostat after she set it (LOL)
Now, I had been handling bills on my own (or with roommates rather) for a while at that time, but never really realized just how serious a winter-time electric bill could be until this moment. I knew adulthood had gotten real and after I had a stern conversation with the electric company, I knew right then how to play the game so I wouldn’t get played again.
It may have been a normal, or minimal moment for some who have been through this before, but for me, this was my moment of truth to say “yo, I’m an adult; and this is about to get real!” Lol. It was quite a learning experience for me and it was amazing now that I look back on that one memory and am amazed at the few valuable lessons it taught me about some of the most simple things in life. 🙂
What about you; what moment in your life solidified adulthood for you?
Do you all listen to podcasts? Last year, I would say is when I started getting real heavy into having a rotation of podcasts that I listen to on a regular basis. I don’t watch much TV outside of my ratchet Mondays, and TGIT; so I’ve been substituting listening to podcasts on some days instead of watching tv when nothing is on. When I look at my Podcast app, I’ve developed quite a healthy rotation, so I decided to do a spotlight on each of my faves for you guys! Here goes!
- The Read
The Read is at the top of the list because it was the first podcast I came across to start listening to when I wanted to get into podcasts. I had heard about them on Twitter and decided to give them a shot. That was over a year ago and I haven’t looked back. Kid Fury and Crissle are truly my best friends in my head and listening to them is like sitting around on the couch on a friday night drinking and talking about all the bullcrap that goes on in the world. From pop culture to politics, if you want to hear a good unfiltered and unedited opinion on how they feel about something, make sure you’re downloading The Read’s episode every Thursday.
- The Friend Zone
Because who in the hell wants a musty brain? As soon as I found out Crissle and Fran had friends with a podcast, I blindly subscribed to it; not knowing what I was getting into. Little did I know I stumbled upon another gem! The Friend Zone is my mental escape and the place where I get ideas about my mental wellness with Fran, new music with Assante and get the recap on whatever has happened on tv that week with Dustin. Fran, Dustin and Assante are just what I need to get a good laugh in when I’m having a rough week and will clue you into some amazing perspective about life that you never thought about.
- Gettin’ Grown
When Gettin’ Grown came out and I heard the concept, I thought, “this is EXACTLY what I need to be listening to!” Gettin’ Grown is your weekly sit down at the kitchen table with Jade and Keia, as we discuss the struggle through this thing we call adulting, and how many of us are barely getting it right! Despite the hurdles, Jade and Keia are there every week to give advice and personal experience on how to get us through. They highlight people who own their own businesses or who are out here slayin’ life, we sit down at the kitchen table for some real life discussion, have a good laugh at some of the petty peeves in our lives and even highlight some of our favorite self-care techniques! Gettin’ Grown is a podcast that everyone who has crossed into the adulting threshhold needs to listen to just to know that you aren’t the only one who has a hard time getting life all the way together!
- Jade and XD
Jade and XD is my random podcast. There is usually a topic with Jade and XD, but most times, I listen to them because a lot of it feels very sporadic and feels like random Friday night conversation after a long and exhausting week at work. It feels like you can pull up to the mic with them, pour up a drink and join the conversation.
- Levar Burton Reads
I just recently started listening to Levar Burton Reads after listening to an episode of The Read in which he was a guest on and he talked about his podcast. I decided to check it out for a couple reasons; 1) I wanted to expand the genre of stories I was into, 2) I am trying to get into this audiobook thing and what better way to start than through a podcast dedicated to listening to Levar Burton read stories?!
- hey, girl
hey, girl is a podcast that I listen to to weekly sometimes as my self-care. The podcast is made up of different interviews conducted by alex elle with different women from all w alks of life. Each woman sits down and discusses a different topic; from divorce, to m ental h ealth, to activism, to trying to conceive. These women have chosen to open up and have some of the tough conversations and open up like you wouldn’t believe.
These are the top 6 podcasts I am in love with right now, and probably won’t ever stop listening to!
What about you guys, what podcasts do you all listen to?? Leave a comment and let me know!!
As a child, there’s always something that you’re getting in trouble for or known for in your family that will live on in infamy. My pitfall? Lying. My mother would tell you I used to lie relentlessly. I would lie like it was a language I was fluent in. She would ask me a question so simple, and a lie would roll off my tongue like water. It was bad, y’all. The worst part was I usually got caught in my lie, and didn’t lie very well; which led to tons of yelling, disappointment and a good helping of corporal punishment (or what some of us like to call a good ass whooping).
Now that I am clear into my adulthood, I often look back and wonder why I lied so much? Why was it so easy to tell my mother I liked an outfit that I really didn’t; causing her to spend money she didn’t have to spend? Why was it simple enough to tell her I was doing well in school when really I was almost failing two classes? Why did it appear to be lesser of the two evils to tell her what I knew she wanted to hear, as opposed to telling her the truth when I knew one thing she hated most in life was a liar?
Did I want her to hate me? No. I wanted her to love me. I wanted to be a child who didn’t always get in trouble; and in my eyes, the real truth meant trouble. So to eliminate that, I decided to lie about some of the simplest things, which ultimately led to me getting in more trouble than I had originally would have been in (the irony).
Truth is, lying has been glorified to some degree as a means to show how much you love someone. I can’t remember exactly which movie this came from, but I remember someone saying “I lie because I care enough to spare your feelings!” *insert major side-eye here*. Yea, I hear that now and it sounds like crap. Lying to someone who’s only wish of you is to be honest with them is silly. I clearly grew up learning this the hard way, as I seemed to not believe this until I got older.
Anytime I wanted to tell the truth, I thought that I would feel the unholy wrath of my mother far worse than if I told a lie. I figured a lie would buy me some time in the “good child” department, so I went that route; only to find out that the punishment on the lying side of life was just as brutal, if not worse than the consequences for telling the truth! I couldn’t win for losing.
One day, when I transitioned into “grown-up with bills and adulting struggles”, I realized a shocking truth about moms; you’re allowed to disagree with them, and they won’t slap you in the mouth! Lol. There used to be a time in my life where being blatantly honest with my mother scared the hell out of me; I imagined a thorough lecture on how I wasn’t “grown” and then it possibly end in some form of physical discipline. That was something I just wasn’t down to hear. Now, I can easily tell my mother the God’s honest truth about something and she won’t care (usually this means she will still do what she wants anyway, but at least I didn’t have to lie to her, lol). I must say, telling the truth is a lot less stressful than telling lies, which I thought would be my lifelong occupation, lol.
My only fear is that I didn’t conform in time, and my daughter will inherit this nasty lying trait that her mother once had. I have a feeling karma is coming in all its glory for me, and I am not ready. Truth be told, she already accuses me of things I haven’t done and I wonder, “Is this it, God? Is this the chapter of our lives when we go through lying? But she’s so young! I thought I had more time!” Smh. This is life I suppose.
So, for all you pre-adolescent, adolescents and teenagers out there; love your moms. Be honest with them because they would rather you be honest, than have them go through all this trouble for something that wasn’t even true. Trust me, I’ve lived to tell the tale.
Despite what you may think, honesty really is the best policy. 🙂