Self-Care Sunday: Give Your Goal a “Why”

As we near the end of the first month of 2018, a lot of us are checking in with ourselves and making sure that our goals and intentions for 2018 are still in tact; while most of us have already fallen by the wayside at Week 2. While we all had lofty goals and everything sounded good on 1/1/18, by now I’m sure some of us may be slipping into old habits and forgetting why we set goals in the first place. One way we can overcome this hurdle, is by remembering one important question in all of this; “Why?”

“Why did you choose this goal over any others for the year to achieve? Why did you want this to be the one thing you focused on? Why did you want to succeed in this particular area in your life?” These are just a few of the questions that begin to build a foundation to finding out some fascinating information about yourself, and about the intentions you set in motion for your year ahead.

I am no stranger to this bad habit, and there have been many years that I have fallen into this self-inflicted trap; and by February, I was back to my bad habits. For 2018, I am trying to do things a little differently, and this year, I think one way to combat that first month of the year burnout, is to sit down with your list of goals and really dig glen to the root of why you made those goals in the first place.

If you have more than one, maybe they all tie into one common “why” for the 2018 year, or maybe you have different “why’s” for each goal; either way, each goal has an overall reason why you want to achieve it, and you have a right to yourself to find out what that is, and you owe it to yourself to commit to staying consistent with those goals.

Once you are able to really determine the why behind your overall goals, the mission for your life may appear a lot clearer to you, and also, your goal may seem a lot more important if you remember that there is actually a deeper reasoning behind all of this. You deserve to give yourself 100% effort towards working with achieving whatever you set out for yourself in order to make this a more positive and prosperous year ahead and sometimes it takes a little self-reflection to see that.

Asking yourself the question why also gives you the room to understand and know whether or not you need to alter or change your goals for the year. It’s never too late to make life changes, and sometimes you find that something you thought is for you, turns out to not be in your best interest after all. If that happens, you just have to learn to adjust your goals and put new ones in place. Life changes in an instant and nothing in this world I believe is meant to remain consistent. If things are meant to be changed then they can be changed and will be changed.

As we begin to dive into 2018, I encourage all of us to do some check-ins and definitely ask yourself the hard question of “why”. Find out why the goals we put forth are important, what will they do for our lives and how they will impact us positively. If they will not have any benefit to us, make some changes, but if they need to be modified, put forth the best effort into them that you can, because ultimately, you are the one striving to achieve them, and you want to be proud of the plan you put in place for yourself and what your were able to accomplish at the end of the year.

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Dear Accountability,

It’s January 1 and it’s time to begin the list of goals for this month/year. You’ve done good planning for this moment, and now it’s finally here. So today, celebrate the fact that you’re already on the right track towards keeping yourself accountable.

One thing you shouldn’t do is be overly critical of yourself during this time; which can be quite easy to do when you’re working on maintaining some personal accountability. Things won’t always be perfect and go exactly as they are planned, so don’t beat yourself up about that. Instead, learn to bounce back, regroup and focus on not allowing setbacks to hold you back.

There’s so much in store for you in this month alone. Claiming success and positive change and speaking those things into existence is key in this new journey and self-motivated project. The key thing is that you have to remember, that while we’re all not perfect, we have to remember to force ourselves to remember that accountability and honesty are two of the key things needed in order to be successful at anything.

Do Black Lives Matter to Us?

My husband and I were having a discussion about the latest tragedies, where innocent black lives are being taken for no particular reason. I told him how it literally made me sick to think about; to know that yet another man/woman/child is being slain by a white person. I am usually not one to focus solely on the specifics of it just being black on white crime, but lately it’s hard to ignore or spin any other way.

My husband on the other hand, had a different perspective of the situation. I am paraphrasing what he said, but he basically asked this question:

black people are using these opportunities to rally, march and speak out about the racial war between us and white people, but what about the internal race war against ourselves?

That question really made me think long and hard about things. Most times, when I am on Facebook, I see just as much violence between blacks as I do against us. On one hand, I stand firm and will support the hash tag #BlackLivesMatter at every opportunity, but at the same time, when will our race begin to take on that mentality with each other?

Continue reading “Do Black Lives Matter to Us?”