Why is this such a hard concept for us to accept??
Why are people inclined to indirectly call people liars when they tell or show you who they are?
Maya Angelou is famous for this particular quote:
Plain and simple; if someone is telling you something about themselves, you owe it to them and yourself to believe what they are saying. Why? Simply put, they are the only experts on their lives. Only they can bear their own truths to you.
What if I Cant Accept it?
A lot of times, we are difficult to accept another’s behavior. We don’t want to believe or accept that if a person shows us that they have bad traits, or they are blatantly telling us that they do not want something because they are not good for us or good for a situation, we don’t want to believe it.
So, when we are unwilling to accept this, we will attempt to rewire that person and make them what we want them to be. We will force our ideals and opinions on them. We’ll want to beg and plead for them to try and force something that does not fit, just to appease our idea that what we want has to work. Guess what? That is not how life and people work.
A Harsh Reality on Human Behavior
The harsh reality about human behavior is this: we give each other the answers that we need to interact healthily with one another every day. I can give someone the cheat code to deal with me, and they have the ability to say “yes” or “no” at that moment. Choosing to deal with me by no means, means that you need to decide to change me. If I show you who I am, believe me.
And if someone shows you who they are, believe them. Don’t let them tell you twice. Life is too short to spend time with someone who is no longer for you.
Personally, I am learning these painful lessons slowly; but they are meaningful. And I know one day they will bring me peace.